Seems like whenever you ask a child if they are OK with their parents getting divorced they will almost certainly answer "yes". Probably cause they have seen the deterioration of the relationshop and that they mostly feel that the decision has been made anyhow. The reality is that most kids are not fine with divorce as it seldom fixes probelms. It just trades one set of problems for another and adds additional challenges into other peoples lives as friendships adjust to accommodate the change in relationships.
I have been faced with families entering the "divorce proceedings" world and I do know how people would respond if I questioned the rationale with them. Divorce is ugly in most instances (now I know there are exceptions and sometimes cirumstances are really dire) as it is not the best way to deal with the circumstances. An illustration that was given to me a few years ago now was to glue two pieces of paper together and then to try to separate them. Chances are that you could successfully end up with two pieces of paper, but not the two original, there will be scars and there will be bits of each piece of paper with the other.
Simply when faced with a narriage that is in crisis one is faced with three options:
- keep the status quo and continue with how things are
- call it quits
- do what it takes to fix it
Getting back to the matter of kids and how they should handle it. Is there anyone out there that has some insight, or has been through this themselves and has got some real examples to share?
